10 Lessons Jeremy Lin Teaches Us
February 21, 2012 | 
Author If you live in the NY area like I do, you can’t help but be swept up by the newest brand in town – Jeremy Lin. Even if you aren’t a basketball fan, you know that the young Lin has caused quite a stir the past two weeks in going from benchwarmer to the new starting point guard for the New York Knicks, helping the team win 7 games in a row with two of their big stars out of action. He’s considered the world’s fastest growing athlete brand.
Jeremy Lin is not only a great NBA story but a great story about how we should all approach our work. His is a story of persistence and being ready to capitalize on your opportunities.
There was a good article in Forbes on lessons for the workplace. I’ve included the 10 lesson but I suggest you read the full article for details.
Just Lin, Baby! 10 Lessons Jeremy Lin Can Teach Us Before We Go To Work Monday Morning – Forbes
1. Believe in yourself when no one else does.
2. Seize the opportunity when it comes up.
3. Your family will always be there for you, so be there for them.
4. Find the system that works for your style.
5. Don’t overlook talent that might exist around you today on your team.
6. People will love you for being an original, not trying to be someone else.
7. Stay humble.
8. When you make others around you look good, they will love you forever.
9. Never forget about the importance of luck or fate in life.
10. Work your butt off.
Action: What lessons can you apply to your own work and family life?
To Find Happiness, Forget Passion
Seriously?! A few weeks ago there was a blog post titled “To Find Happiness, Forget About Passion” in the Harvard Business Review. It was about how the current twenty-somethings have been following their passion. We (Baby Boomers) encouraged them to do this because we didn’t get that chance. What they are discovering is following their passion does not always lead to top paying jobs. The author proposed a different frame of reference: Forget about finding your passion. Instead, focus on finding big problems.
That doesn’t quite work for us. As midlife women, we have ignored or buried our passions for way too long. We encouraged our kids to follow their bliss because we never did. I believe there’s still time to do that – at midlife, if not now, when?
So I propose a twist – find your passion and then find a big problem to solve in the area of your passion. We know happiness is not found from simply looking within. We have to do something in the world. Finding a problem we’re passionate about changes our perspective. It’s not about the self anymore. It’s about how you can be a valuable contributor.
At midlife, we have the advantage over the younger generations. Most likely our job did pay the bills – but it may not have satisfied our hearts. We have enough experience that when we discover our passion, we may even instantly know the associated big problems. If we combine our decades worth of skills, vast network of connections and resources with our newly discovered passion, we can add real value to solving big problems.
The HBR post’s closing statement said: “Happiness comes from the intersection of what you love, what you’re good at, and what the world needs. We’ve been told time and again to keep finding the first. Our schools helped developed the second. It’s time we put more thought on the third.”
I agree with his first sentence. But it’s funny how at midlife we have the order different. Our jobs helped us develop what we’re good at. Now’s the time to find our passion, apply our skills to help the world.
Do you know what you are passionate about?
Action: Find your passion. Start a list – what do you always gravitate to? What are your lost dreams? What are your values? What do you never grow tire of talking about? What do you wish you had chosen for a career? Now, what big problem is associated with it that you can help solve?
Posted in Career Reinvention, Midlife, Personal Development | 
Tags: midlife, midlife women, network, passion, possibilities | 
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Busy, Busy Bee
What did you respond the last time you asked someone how work was? I bet I know. It’s the same thing almost everyone says – “busy”. And how many personal commitments have you broken because you’re too busy?
The response is almost programmed. No need to even think. Sadly, it’s usually said proudly and worn as a badge of honor, as if I should be impressed. Well, I’m not. I used to work with someone whose personal brand could simply be the word “busy”. That’s bad but that’s how he was known. He was always late to calls, showing no respect for others. He never apologized, just told everyone how busy he was, as if they weren’t too.
I must admit that “busy” had been my response for years. Even if my calendar has gaps, sometimes I get “busy” and totally forget appointments – like I did last week. It was embarrassing and the last straw for me. I have to shift my mindset.
How did we find ourselves in a society where busy was an almost acceptable way to be? We’ve talked of being busy for so long that we’ve forgotten that being busy was never the goal. This thinking has led us to believe busy is good…no matter what we’re busy with. Being busy is not the way we should measure our worth.
I propose a revolt against being busy
Don’t get me wrong, I am not encouraging laziness or not getting things done. It’s quite the opposite. What I’m proposing is a revolt against saying you’re so busy. Busy is a state of mind – one that often causes stress, unhappiness and wasted energy.
I propose that we all take a moment to stop, recognize this unhealthy state and make the decision to no longer be “busy”. Enjoy the weight that gets lifted off your back simply by changing your focus. Perception is reality and none of us need “busy” to be that reality. I bet you’ll get even more done and have time left over to do the things you really care about.
So, I am done being busy. That is no longer my response to life. My calendar may be full but I won’t let it mean I’m busy. And that’s liberating.
How busy are you right now? Pride and satisfaction are not found in busy. Decide not to be. It doesn’t mean you don’t get things done. It just means you do them calmly and with intent. Life can never be too busy for the things that matter most to you. If you don’t have time for those, the busywork won’t matter anyway.
Action: Give it a try. This week, take the “I’m not busy challenge”. All you have to do is commit to not responding to anyone with how busy you are (even if it feels like you are totally swamped). Don’t even adjust your schedule. Just change your language. It will be harder than you think. You’ll stumble on what words to use to replace the cultural norm. Try “exciting” or “full” or “productive” or maybe “all kinds of fun things”. Then begin to act like it.
Why have a dream?
In last week’s post I talked about selecting a word that represents your vision or intention for the year. You may have dreamed a little and imagined your life throughout the year. Was it connected to your larger dream for your life and career? I know mine is.
Having a compelling vision or dream helps you get excited and motivated about your goals. It makes them more real and tangible. If you feel discouraged and your motivation lags, you can come back to the vision and be renewed in your energy to work towards your goals.
It’s important to be clear about the year you want for yourself. The mystery of the law of attraction says that all your thoughts, all images in your mind and all the feelings connected to your thoughts will later manifest as your reality. You will receive the type of energy you send out. You attract into your life whatever you give your focus to.
When we set a vivid vision with positive emotions in mind, synchronicity often follows. We find ourselves encountering the necessary opportunities to reach our vision and therefore physically bringing about our desires.
So, how will your word manifest itself?
Just the act of documenting it – writing or with pictures – has a subconscious impact and starts a process where you take action toward achieving it. If you haven’t been able to get to your word or phrase for the year, try these exercises to help you imagine your year. Let your vision help you reach your intention.
Create a Vision Board
In a previous post, I talked about Vision Boards for your big dreams. I also like making smaller boards for smaller focuses and intentions. Creating your vision in pictures removes obstacles about choosing the right words or your tendency to edit yourself. Pictures release your boundaries.
This is not a simple cut and paste activity. It’s a magical energy exercise. It’s a thought provoking activity that helps boost your ability to believe in your vision. Your emotions and energies get opened and focused. You get a clear direction of what’s important for you right now.
Action: Get a poster board or large piece of paper. Pull images from a variety of magazines or the internet – ones that call out to you and are associated with your intention for the year. React with your heart not your head. Don’t edit. Don’t force the selection or pick pictures because you “should”. Don’t worry about what they might mean. Paste them onto the page. Include words and phrases. In large letters include your word for the year. If you don’t have it yet, study your images and let a word rise up.
Create a Vision Statement
While it’s still fresh, why not write it out, in great detail. What does the word mean to you? How will you live your life or career differently? How will you feel at the end of the year? How does it fit into your bigger vision? Make it a vivid and idealized description of how you’d like to live your life throughout the year.
Action: Write quickly – for about 15 minutes. Don’t edit. Use present tense – not “I will” rather “I am”. By assuming you are already there prevents self-limiting thoughts. Describe your emotions. A strong emotional description infuses your statement with passion and makes it even more compelling, inspiring and energizing. It will inspire, energize, motivate and stimulate your creativity.
An interesting alternative is to write a letter from your future self to your current self, looking back a year later. Using the guidance above, describe your wonderful new way of being and how you got there.
More Action: If you’d like more information on the power of your vision, creating a vision board and vision statement are part of my CLEAR PATH process to help you clarify your career goals and make the transition to your next chapter with clarity and confidence. See more at www.YourNextChapterNOW.com
Posted in Career Reinvention, Creativity, Personal Development | Tags: attitude change, dream, life transition, personal development, personal growth, vision, vision board | No Comments »
Ring in the New!
Set your intention
For the last couple of years I’ve chosen a single word that sets my intention and direction for the new year. I needed a change from the usual resolutions which seemed to always be a list of things I should change. I preferred to set out with a positive intention. My intention would guide my actions to make it happen. It’s something I want to do or become.
An intention is compelling and attainable, something you want to move toward. It involves envisioning the larger picture of who you want to be and then taking the steps needed to get there. It may be a distillation of your unique values, strengths, and interests.
A single word can be powerful. The right one contains energy, images and meaning – things our hearts and souls get excited about. It feels more purposeful. There’s room for discovery along the way. However, I’ll admit it is not easy finding the right word.
My 2011 Word
In 2011, I started with the word Commit. It sounded right at the time. But then things started happening that made me feel boxed in by that word. By mid-February, it was already limiting the possibilities surrounding what was happening in my life – some good and not so good. The word Open came into my mind. It felt more authentic.
The right word let me have a good 2011. It let me graciously back down some of my plans and allowed new opportunities to happen.
- I headed to Florida more than expected to help support my mom after my dad had a stroke and a series of seizures.
- I accepted an opportunity to really stretch myself. Unfortunately that did not work out (see Fire Yourself post) but I’m still glad I gave it a shot.
- I was offered several marketing jobs – one to redesign the client experience in the growth market territory of my former company. It was creative, lucrative and allowed me strengthen my personal brand as an innovative marketing consultant.
- I was still able to grow my coaching business by adding 2 new offerings – Personal Branding and Build Your Business.
- And on a very positive note, it let me stop feeling compelled to be a “wedding planner” to my newly engaged son and just trust that they would create a lovely wedding that was authentic to them.
One of the biggest lessons I learned was the beautiful balance of letting go and saying yes to opportunities that present themselves.
Select your word
First, be aware that if this is your very first year choosing a word, be willing to be imperfect about it. This practice gets better and better each year you do it!
Your word is meant to teach you about you – including your own reactions to the things. The type of word depends on what’s happening in your world. For me, I want a word that would bring clarity to my year’s focus. This year it’s heading toward a feeling I’d like to hold throughout the year (Joy). Sometimes I aim for a verb that drives action (Open) or something positive that could be an attitude changer (Celebrate.)
Action: Ring in the New!
- Think through your year – expectations and any events you know will be happening. Write them down.
- How do you feel about them now? How would you like to feel about them?
- Write out a list of possible words that can help you focus on the feeling you’d like to have.
- How will this word change your life by the end of the year? How will it enhance your personal brand? Write out how each could help you get there.
Don’t struggle or fret about it. It may take a couple of days but one will naturally emerge. Sometimes it may even take a few words or a phrase. You’ll know when you’ve found it. It will feel right. It will be authentic to you.
Now post it everywhere, surround yourself – on your mirror, refrigerator, your office white board, make it your screen saver – just keep it in view.
Let me know your word and how it will drive your year.
Happy New Year!
Posted in Personal Branding, Personal Development | Tags: personal branding, personal development, personal growth, possibilities | No Comments »
Wring Out the Old
Here we are at the beginning of 2012. How did you feel about 2011? Was it a good year for you? Before you move forward into the new year, now is a good time to reflect on your past year.
Think of it as “wringing out” the old year – with the intent of letting it all go. OK, wring – meaning “to extract by twisting or squeezing” – might be a little drastic but it’s a nice homonym for ring – as in Ring in the New Year (next week’s blog post).
We all want to let go of disappointments and losses, but by also letting go of your past accomplishments, you create space for new things to show up in your life. You’ll be ready to move on and to take on new opportunities.
1. Start by doing a quick, gut feel assessment of 2011. Look at all the areas of your life. Think quickly, off the top of your head. Use these overarching questions to spark your reflection:
- What was the most exciting, heart-stirring thing that happened in your life and/or business this year?
- Did you make conscious choices or just let things happen?
- Did you strengthen your personal brand?
- What was your biggest learning?
- How did you stretch yourself?
2. Now take a deeper look.
- List all of your Wins, Successes and Breakthroughs
- List all of your Losses, Disappointments and Breakdowns
3. Now, choose 5-7 lessons you’ve learned from both your disappointments and your accomplishments that you want to bring forward into 2012.
Ask yourself the following questions to help uncover nuggets of learning:
- What were you most proud of accomplishing?
- Which goals were easier to meet than you thought? Which ones were more challenging? Why?
- How did you honor your values?
- What did you enjoy doing that you want to do more of?
- What do you need to stop doing or let go of?
- What do you wish you had done?
Your responses will not only help you recap all that you’ve accomplished this year, but they’ll also help pave the way for the new year.
Action:
Grab a piece of paper or your journal. Find a quiet place to sit. Allow your mind to wander. Use the questions above and just starting writing. See any themes or common threads?
Start thinking about the new year. Next week, the blog post will be about setting your intentions for 2012. Your reflections on 2011 will be your starting point.
Comment below on how you feel about your year.
Posted in Personal Branding, Personal Development | Tags: accomplishments, new year, personal branding, personal development, success | No Comments »
The Gift of Being Present
Are you enjoying this holiday season? Are you taking time to look around, see the lights and decorations? Are you being thoughtful in your gift buying? Are you taking care of yourself?
Or are you totally stressed? End of the year holiday shopping and family expectations are enough to manage without adding on work stress. That’s a formula for disaster. So many people dread this time of year. In midlife that stress takes its toll far more than on your younger self. This can be a joyous time of year.
You can choose to spend your time and energy on what brings you joy. You can make decisions based on what you want instead of what others want. I know it’s a challenge but what better time to start than during this holiday season.
Honoring yourself is the greatest gift you can give to yourself and to others. Your life will be far richer when you stop to enjoy it!
Action: Take these actions right now so can you can experience a joyous holiday season.
1. Eliminate your energy drainers and your stressors. Make a quick list of your current most immediate tasks that have filled your plate. Sometimes just the act of writing a list makes it more manageable – something more tangible that you can tackle. What is distracting you from enjoying this season? List work and personal tasks.
2. Check your emotional health. What are you feeling while looking at the list? Now, breathe deeply. Fill your lungs. Let it out slowly. Look at your list again. What can be put off until next year? What can quickly be done? What can be done by others? Prioritize the rest and do them.
3. Add more joy. Put yourself at the top of your priority list. Slow down. You’re under control. Keep breathing. Be aware of your surroundings. Be present in your environment. Reawaken your feelings – let the good ones come in. Think about what you really want to do. Be sure it includes taking care of yourself. Have fun. Laugh, let those endorphins flow. Feel good again.
Give yourself the gift of being present this season. Slow down, take time for your life.
Happy Holidays! Happy New Year!
Build Your Strategic Network
How did you do with assessing your current web in the last post? Are you getting what you need from your network? If you haven’t read it, check it before going further. http://www.yournextchapternow.com/blog/2011/10/whos-in-your-web.html
There are a variety of networks we use and are part of every day. And then there is the network we should have. Having an integrated and diverse network is smart. You need the right blend to provide the right support and perspective as opportunities and situations present themselves.
However, even in midlife, women are not always confident about reaching out. It might feel superficial or unauthentic. Could be fear of rejection. You don’t feel justified asking for what seems like a favor. Maybe you just never thought to even ask.
First, realize it’s not one way. Simply by definition, a relationship is mutual. It might help if you know what value you have to offer – even if reciprocation is not now but down the road – whether with references or connections, information or a listening ear.
It’s well documented that most positions are filled through networking. You need to be sure you’re known out there. Look where you want to go and who can help you get there. Then make time for building that relationship. We’re social animals – stop eating at your desk and go to lunch or have coffee or tea (in a real cup, please, not paper).
A strategic view
Let’s think strategically about the circles of our web. Of course, there’s our personal support inner circle. We rely on them to keep us going and rejuvenate us when stressed. Do they all fill that need?
The middle circle – typical more focused on helping us in our current career and position. We help each other get our jobs done and manage our current responsibilities. Do we cultivate them beyond just getting the job done?
And the outer group – those who help us in our career and business directions and help us achieve our larger goals. They should be both internal within your company and external to help you get a different perspective. Have you nurtured this group?
Action: Build your strategic network.
1. Start with the inner circle. Quickly go through and assess each person.
- Do they bring you joy? Keep them.
- Are they an energy drain? Dump them.
- Is there someone you want to reconnect with? Do it even through email.
2. Spend more time looking at the middle and outer circles. Who has added value to your career and helped you with the following?
- Let people know who you are
- Clarify your career path
- Improve your opportunity for promotion
- Gain additional expertise
- Act as mentor when needed
- Gain access to critical projects
- Introduce you to a new field or industry
If you can’t answer yes to any, either you aren’t asking enough of them or they don’t belong in your circle.
3. Create your Strategic Network Plan.
Strategic relationships are formed with a specific purpose or goal in mind. Know your goal or understand what you need to learn. Figure out who can help and how they can help you achieve it. Learn to ask in a way that people know what you need – be specific.
For each of the people inSstep 2 that you can answer yes to and have been of value to your career. Then add new names of those you want to and need for your larger goals.
Create a networking action chart with 4 columns, titled left to right:
- Goals – put one of your goals. The same goal can be in several boxes.
- Contacts – write the name of a new contact you’d like to make or someone in your current network from the middle or outer circle – one who you answered “yes” that they add value to your career.
- Mutual Value – be thoughtful about the value you can bring to each other by cultivating a relationship.
- Action – list specific actions and date to reach out.
Now, execute your plan. Check it regularly to keep you focused. Soon it will become quite natural.
If you would like to make career transitions with clarity and confidence, see my coaching services at http://www.YourNextChapterNOW.com
Posted in Career Management, Networking | Tags: career management, midlife women, network, networking, opportunity | No Comments »
Who’s in your web?
Last week I separately spent time with 3 women, each I have known for over 20 years. Not only do we socialize at dinner or ballet, discussing mid-life issues, these are friends that I also discuss my business with and they talk about theirs with me.
We’re no longer employees of anyone. We each own our own business and we’re all at various stages of growth. We use each other as a sounding board, seeking advice and counsel. We only know what we know and when something doesn’t work – we wonder why. So we need others who can help us step back and assess and add new perspective or knowledge. Lots of ways of describing them – they are part of my personal advisory board, my board of directors, my web, my core support group.
All relationships matter
As women we naturally develop these types of trusting and supportive relationships. But do we go beyond and also develop the broader more strategic network of mentors and associates? I know I need to do more of this.
They serve a broader purpose – a more pragmatic and transactional way to learn something or get something done. And of course, it needs to be mutually beneficial. It’s easier to reach out to others when you have something to offer – whether it’s your skills or at least being in some type of position to return the favor, even if it’s not immediate.
Be authentic
Having an integrated and diverse network of people is smart and a practical way to balance and complement your talents and weaknesses. Be sure to pursue these valuable relationships with integrity.
Always understand what you would like out of it and what you have to offer in return. It may even be broad like entrée into their network or introduction to another person who may be able to help.
Then be trustworthy and transparent up front about your intentions. Tell them what you are interested in or need help with. This lets the person make a choice to help you or not.
Do you connect?
Take a few minutes and assess how well you use your current relationships and network.
- Do you normally try to work out everything yourself?
- Do you have mostly close friends who think like you?
- Do you consciously take time to build out your network?
- Have you used your network to achieve something?
- How often do you collaborate with someone outside your immediate team?
- Have you thought through the types of support you need?
- When was the last time you added people to your network?
This should give you a general idea of your professional network and how you capitalize on it – or not. Now let’s look at your specific network.
Action: Size up your network web.
1. Draw 3 concentric circles.
2. In the inner ring place all your friends and personal support. These are people you can count on. Your cheerleaders. They believe in you. They’re your personal public relations team.
3. In the middle circle, add career mentors or advisors, people who provide you with valuable advice or have complementary skills to yours. These may be friends as well.
4. In the outer circle, list people you associate with who add to your credibility and your personal brand as an expert or specialist just being associated with them.
5. Now take a look –
- How big is each circle?
- Is it balanced between internal and external people?
- How diverse is it – age, gender, skills, industry?
- Does it include old and new relationships?
- How were the relationships developed?
If it feels right to you, congratulations! For most of us, I’m going to venture a guess that it’s not as balanced as it could be, especially the outer circle.
Stay tuned for the next blog on how to build out a strategic network that’s just right for you.
Midlife Job Hunting Resources
I just returned from an amazing and relaxing vacation in the NW peninsula of the US. I found it to be absolutely the most beautiful and spiritual area of our country. Old growth forests with 800 year old cedars and deep clear glacier lakes made me feel very connected to the earth. Whatever problems I was carrying around suddenly were very insignificant.
Our last night was in Seattle where I picked up the Seattle Times newspaper and got right back into thinking about midlife career coaching. They have a NWJobs blog where I found lots of resources to help older workers find jobs. I must admit I did bristle at finding 50-somethings being called “pre-seniors”. Really??? At 61 and still working strong, I certainly don’t consider myself anywhere near pre-senior.
The article mentioned that about 17 percent of the current work force is 65 or older. Not surprising, in these economic times, people are delaying retirement or at least changing their ideas of retirement. Maybe it’s reinvention to a completely different career or a part time position in an interesting area to keep the brain stimulated and earn at the same time.
There was sound advice on networking being the most effective way for seniors and pre-seniors to find work. You’ve spent a lifetime building your network, it’s time to get out and leverage it. Other strategies include – attend workshops, volunteer in the public or private sector, and talk with people who work in the job you are pursuing to learn more.
It’s also smart to freshen up your resumes and cover letters to convey “activity, energy and achievement” and avoid the word “experience” in resumes and interviews. Cover letters should highlight technical credentials, recent training and certifications to show willingness to improve.
Older help wanted
Here are some online resources for mid-lifers and retirees looking for part-time or full-time work, many of which target anyone 50 or over:
AARP Work offers a section focusing on jobs and job training, “Job Tips for 50+ Workers,” and a job search engine for older workers.
Encore provides news, resources and connections for individuals and organizations establishing “encore careers” designed to combine social contribution, personal meaning and financial security. Many of the jobs posted are in education, health care and human services.
Retired Brains is a resource for older boomers, seniors, retirees and those about to retire who are looking to find jobs, volunteer opportunities, educational resources and retirement information. There’s a section on starting or purchasing your own business.
Retirement Jobs has tens of thousands of listings nationwide from companies specifically seeking candidates older than 50. A combination job board, adviser and coach for boomers and seniors looking for work. Retirement Jobs also partners with AARP.
Retirement Jobs Online offers advice about online retirement jobs, helping retirees evaluate the various ways to use the Internet to find work.
Retire and Consult was created to help those nearing or in retirement to put their knowledge and experience back to work. You can get consulting tips, post a resume or search their job bank.
Senior Helpers has offices in more than 200 U.S. cities and hires many older workers to provide in-home personal and companion care for seniors. Caregivers’ services include help with housework, meal preparation, errands, transportation, medication reminders and Alzheimer’s care. The pay is $8-$12 per hour; most work an average of about 20 hours per week. CNBC sees the Healthcare field growing and a good fit for many older workers.
Senior Job Bank is a site where job seekers age 50 and older can search for jobs by category, industry or location, post resumes and register for a job-search agent.
Action: Focus on an area where you have a passion for your possible new career. Explore different fields. This is a time to truly enjoy your work. Be creative. Keep a positive attitude, seek new opportunities and remain flexible. If you would like coaching, take a look the services on my website Your Next Chapter NOW!
Posted in Career Reinvention, Job Search, Networking | Tags: career change, career transition, job search, midlife, networking, possibilities | No Comments »